Today has been a "tears in heaven" day, with heaps of rain. I'm still reflecting a little on the balloon tradegy. If you are a regular reader, you'll have worked out I like images, metaphors etc. Although I always remember this talk by Sam Hunt when he was asked for an interpretation of the lines in his poem, and he said something like: the words say what they F***kin say, there's no need to overanalyse them. There's a balance somewhere in using metaphors and as Nike marketing would say just doing it.
I never understood the science of the hot air balloon, although I understood the basic principle that the hot air made it elevate. What I understood was there was just something magical and majestic, when on the best of days you could see the balloon drifting in contrast to the landscape. It was like the balloon could hold all your dreams and suspend them in air. The balloon was the "castle in the air".When I looked out my bedroom window this morning, I realised I'll never see the big green balloon again drift pass my window, or over my back yard. It's gone (gone gone). Rather dramatically. Literally, BOOM. I'll also never hear the sound of the gas burners pumping it up anymore. In the scheme of things these are material things, and as I noted yesterday, nothing compared to the grief the families and friends of the deceased will be feeling. The balloon was something that was familar to me, and now that familarity has been interrupted.
The relevance of this is, and it may seem an odd link to make,. I'm still struggling with the change in image for my body. I want it. Yeah, I do. I latch onto metaphors, but the reality is I'm still struggling with changing the space of my body.
EeeK - Today I got a little BOOM tho: I was reminded that on Christmas Day I said to my nephew if he completed the Ocean Swim at Oriental Parade on 29 Jan I would pay for his fare down from Auckland, and that I would enter it too. Heck, I wasn't even drunk!!! Now he has entered, and is expecting me to be there too. It was supposed to be reinforcing positive behaviours and demonstrating some "prosocial" support.... ! I now have three weeks to be able to do this. I may enter the 1k event, although it might be a good idea to see har far I can actually swim the in the Thorndon pool first! - bearing in mind there will not be the opportunity to have rest stops! I may have to enter the 300m entry level swim, as I need to remember that an ocean swim is harder than a pool swim. This is going to neccesitate some serious focus for me over the next three weeks - and necessitate less gym time. Oh, my goodness. It's also going to necessitate some swimming!!!! What was I thinking? No, I know what I was thinking: I have to practice what I preach....
I like a bit of Matchbox 20. I like this track a lot and have played it a lot on my nanopad. It was played quited a lot when I first started going to RPM. The T lady played it on Friday - but actually, on Friday it agitated me! Agitation is good in this context, becasue it means it gets to me. It agitated me in the context of the beginning of year feeling. It is about how far I've come. That's important to reflect on. But it now has to be about how far I'll go next. This 'official' RPM version is good becasue it has some good visuals, including a clip of Muhammed Ali :-)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5d7EbtLb8ok&feature=fvwrel
I kind of like the energy in this live version tho:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QB_F11EuBL4
I found this quote today which I like:
"To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift."
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